Time Smacker: January 2007

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Getting Old

My dear friend from childhood, Kandace (we met in elementary school and reconnected several years ago), sent me this hilarious list of musings "on getting old."

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?"

Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.

These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Jake G. Does Jennifer H.

Seriously (thanks Pink). Spend four minutes and twenty seconds watching this SNL clip on YouTube. F-ing hilarious.

Jake G. does Jennifer H.

My god funny.

Christmas 2006 Photo Retrospective

At last I'm posting photos from our fabulous Christmas Day activities, which was this year at Karl and Michelle's swanky pad across the Bay. What fun it was to spend with Karl and Michelle, Nick, Nikkol, Ana Marie, and my very own Van.

The night got started off with dinner. This being our usual Yum Yum Clubbers it had to start with eating, of course.

Dinner is prepared most every Thursday in this lovely kitchen. Oh how I love this home. And it looks like Karl really knows his way around.

Light on photos -- and besides photos wouldn't do the conversations justice -- we skip right over to dessert and the opening of presents. Nikkol, Van, and Nick get it going!

There sure are a lot of pictures of Nikkol!

Yes, this could well be the Nikkol feature blog -- pictured here opening (and loving) a set of beautiful Martini glasses from Van (her Secret Santa).

The photos are blurry because of my unsteady hand. But mainly because I like to take a slower shutter speed because the coloring is truer to life. A huge flash makes everything stark and unnatural. Not like blurry people are natural ... but whatevs.

Karl opens his gift.

Meanwhile, Michelle dons part of the wrapping from her present. (I was lucky enough to be her Secret Santa this year -- and SHE was likewise lucky to be mine!)

And here's a closing photo of my dear Michelle being goofy-girl-galore. I love her!

This Christmas was by far the best Christmas I can recall. The combination of life, love, stability, and good friends made me realize again how blessed I am.

It could only be better if my Bay Area crew were able to meet my truly fabulous friends in New York, Texas, and Redding, CA. I love you all.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Loving to Learn

I learned a variety of things about my health in May of 2006. One was that my cholesterol falls in the combat zone between good and bad. (The other, of course, was my very low testosterone levels).

So after dealing with the personal issues surrounding the "bigger" issue, I finally took the plunge on October 20. In addition to beginning hormone replacement therapy, which changed my life in remarkable ways, I also began exercising and changing my diet to reduce my cholesterol.

I've learned quite a bit since then about the way things are believed to work: good and bad cholesterol, animal vs. plant protein, simple and carbohydrates, soluble and insoluble fiber, the power of antioxidants, and all sorts of other things I can't believe I never knew. I've been tossing whatever is within reach down my throat for too long. I believe I am finally learning balance -- including knowing when to go ahead and indulge with friends (which of course I do every Thursday).

One of the most enjoyable sites I've found in this little pursuit has been AskDrSears.com, a site maintained by a husband/wife doctor team and two of their doctor children. At first glance, it appears to focus on health for babies and children. But Google introduced the site to me when I began researching the benefits of soy, so I got "back doored" into AskDrSears.com.

They make the science of food and exercise a bit easier to understand -- and therefore come recommended by me as a great resource for anyone looking to make a change in 2007.

Time Smacker